1. Please cover your cleavage at church. Honestly. I don't care if it's 10000 degrees outside. It's not appropriate.
I think it makes me most angry when it's clearly on display on purpose. We ladies all have moments in which our cami's fail to cami, or our children pull our shirts down, hormones or weight fluctuations make things fit not quite right, or something unintentional occurs.
But some dresses are made to show the cleavage. And I don't mean the hint of cleavage, I'm talking 100% putting them out there for display with the help of a good pushup bra sometimes. How is that good or appropriate? My friend, Caroline has posted on this before. I'm thinking of one post in particular (and Caroline if you could send me the link or post in the comments that would be awesome) about not becoming a distraction in the house of the Lord.
And don't give me that crap about it being the style. Honestly.
2. Please stop picking your nose. This is a big no-no in public. And in private.
3. As always, please close your mouth if you are not engaged in speaking. Everyone knows my issues with mouthbreathing (with the nobody's home look on your face) and how ignorant it makes you look. SHUT YO FACE!
Ok, I have discussed this before. There are disclaimers including medical issues or sickness. Or if you are a canine--but even sometimes I find that offensive as well.
4. No one really cares about your one-ups. I hate those people who always, always, always have to one-up you.
You know the people, the one who have always climbed a higher mountain, hurt worse after a workout because they did a better workout, had a bigger travel mishap and the ALWAYS have to say something during conversation. Sometimes three times in a row during the same conversation.
5. If you can't say anything nice, then shut up!
Words, words, words. Believe me, this is personal and there are times I should take my own advice.
However, there are people who are just mean and you learn to love them, and then there are people that are trying to be "funny" and get away with their mean comments. I can't stand those folks. Stop being mean.
There is a difference between light hearted pickin' and mean and rude. If people get mad every time you pick, perhaps you should stop. Because clearly you don't know the line.
6. My goodness, little girls, ease up on the eyeliner and sparkle makeup.
7. And, most importantly: STOP USING THE WORD "AMAZING" IN EVERY SENTENCE! Everything CANNOT be amazing. It just can't. Not possible. Your shoes are not amazing. Your McD's double cheeseburger is not amazing. Your Silly Bandz are not amazing. Ask yourself: Can I use a better adjective? Can I increase my vocabulary? Can I speak better than the average teenaged poptart?
And if you break the word up into "AH-mazing" I may just smack you.
You have been warned.