But I'm finding people outside of the classroom building who are feeling it, too. They've wiped the warpaint on their faces as well and they are going at it with everything they've got, and sometimes it's still not enough. They are killing it on the regular, and are getting killed in return.
It's hard to be "so done" when you can't even get started.
I've had conversations with friends and we've all come to the conclusion that there has got to be a better way. Our lives are operating at maximum capacity and then we see other people in the same life stage, and they are doing it all better with smiles on their faces and with clean-faced children. They are working 9-5 with kids in sports and they go to the gym and still have time for their crafty hobbies. Meanwhile, I'm struggling to get through my day with my cute little 7-9 year old students (who are so, so sweet but extremely taxing on my introvert meter), and then getting home to be a functioning member of the family who listens and does and cooks and cleans and exercises. I feel like I'm flying by the seat of my pants and I'm going full-throttle and still not getting everything done with excellence.
I told my husband last night that I'm handling the necessary things in life, but I'm not doing anything well. I'm going to work, I'm feeding people, I'm ensuring underwear is clean, but I'm not on top of my game by any stretch of the imagination. There is little time for things that fill my tank and my poor tank is nearly bone dry.
And while I feel very sorry for myself, I don't have the time to sort through what it is I'm feeling sorry about.
I don't want this to turn into a "woe is me" post, but there is something to be said for taking care of yourself. We've all been reminded that we can't pour out of empty containers, and there is a lot of truth in that statement. I have found myself daydreaming about dark rooms and blankets and no stimulus for a weekend. I become grumpy and moody when my brain has time to disengage because it only knows how to operate on all cylinders and doesn't know what to do with space anymore. I am anxious and overwhelmed and cannot enjoy downtime because my brain is quickly working through my to-do list.
But, here's the thing I'm telling myself: I'm not competing with anyone else. I'm not trying to be like that other lady who apparently has it all together because her "together" is completely different from mine. Having it together is on a spectrum and for some folks, just getting through the day breathing is all they need to handle. And for others, they might be able to handle all of the spinning plates and smile without having lipstick on their teeth.
And I'm very happy for and amazed by those people.
And I think they are aliens.
And very, very good at crafting themselves on social media.
So, get out there and handle your own business like a boss today. Recognize that you do not have to compete with the world to validate yourself and your importance. All of those people you are dying to impress are merely trying to keep up with themselves and don't have time to think about your achievements. We are all handling our individual challenges, and there is no need to fight for position when you are in a race for one.
Let's run alongside each other, cheer others on, encourage and fight the good fight, and let's manage what's going on in our own lives well.
Happy Saturday, xoxxo