Today's Tiara: Personal Motivation.

A few weeks ago, my beloved trainer accepted a new position and would not longer be able to work with me at my gym.

I was crushed.

This person had met me at one of my lowest points of my life--I was recovering from some postpartum anxiety, dealing with the mommy-body blues, and not feeling good in general.  I was frustrated in a lot of areas of my life and had had enough.

This was taken February 2014:  the weekend I decided to make a commitment to health & wellness.

I was ready to make a change. 

It was not easy, but I confronted a lot of demons and made wellness a priority in my life.  I took time away from friends, family, and used a lot of my free afternoons and Saturdays to hit the gym.  It was a hard process, but by the time spring arrived, I was feeling better about the state of affairs.  

I worked hard for the past two years--some months were easier than others.  I worked through some injuries and aches and pains.  I worked through fear and anxiety.  I felt my entire outlook on life changing, and somewhere along the way, I felt the return of myself.  

But, I knew my goals needed a carrot.  I am a girl driven by stickers and gold stars.  This past September I went to Disney and said goodbye to my granddaddy the next week and still ran a 5K a few days later because I needed to prove something to myself. 

And I was rewarded with a pretty nice hip injury that slowed me down for several weeks.  

Yet, I continued going to the gym, slightly annoyed with myself, and feeling old.  

It hasn't helped that this school year I've felt the internal struggle between making my health a priority and having time for my tween, middle child, and toddler.  I wanted to have time to cook a better dinner for my family and relax with my husband in the evenings.  My calendar is loaded with rehearsals and work and school and life and classes and I was beat down.  I wanted my time to work for me, and not obey the demanding task master that is my calendar.

Post-workout in February.  

So, when my trainer told me he was leaving, I also felt an enormous relief.  It was almost like I had permission to find another way to make it work.  I would no longer have a trainer to answer to each week.  I would no longer have anyone checking over my shoulder.  I was accountable to myself and I was scared and very excited about it.

I am going to work out from home. 

And I am going to make it work. 

My trainer was kind enough to come up with an at-home plan for me to follow.
I'm following this plan 2 days a week with an additional 2-3 days of cardio.  

We've purchased some more weights and I'm getting ready to order a treadmill.  I've found some blogs and training sites to read for encouragement.  I've been working out 4-5 days a week, sometimes at home and sometimes at the gym.  Once my equipment arrives I will be able to work out entirely from the home. 

And I've got my carrot:

To be continued. . .