Some people have been "confessing" to me that certain posts from the last few days have been hitting them between the eyes. I don't know if they are looking for answers from me, or just feel the need to say it out loud to someone. But here's a little secret dear ones:
Mama A ain't got it all figured out.
And the things I write about come from her own experiences--including the successes and failures. With the exception of skanktacular clothing options, I can only speak from things that I know about personally. Some of these posts are finger pointing with three pointing right back at Mama A. So if you're feeling a little icky on the inside or know all too well of the things posted here, know that Mama A is sitting right next to ya' with an extra cup of coffee and some Christmas twinkly lights to brighten the mood. My goal is never to accuse, but perhaps make folks think a little harder about their decisions based on my own humble life experiences and observations.
And don't believe for one second that the two of us are the only two in the boat, either. Chances are that mama who always looks incredible--you know, the one with awesome children, fantastic husband, beautiful home, and a seemingly perfect life is probably dying on the inside,too. The internet makes it all too easy to look perfect, and it also does a great job of making us feel unworthy at the same time.
But I also think the first step to counteract this issue is to be willing to be honest with ourselves and honest with others. This is a delicate process because there is such a thing as over-sharing your business to the world. We don't want to do that (meaning, if you wouldn't shout it out in the middle of your busy workplace, then you probably shouldn't share it with the entire world on social media).
Instead, let's think of the things that we would want to tell our trusted friends, family, church, and co-workers. When we let down our pretenses and costumes of perfection, what do we want people to know? What do we want to say to get to the root of the matter?
I don't know about you, but sometimes I get tired of smiling and saying that everything is fine.
Sometimes I need that 5-minute conversation with a friend who lets me have my moment and I'm better because I've shared my load with someone who is willing to help me. And after I've had that time to connect with someone who has listened and validated my feelings, I don't feel the need to share it again and again and again with everyone else.
But if we can't even be honest with the images we project of ourselves to our closest friends, then how will they ever get to know who we truly are and what we truly need?
It's time to wave our Human Flag high and proud folks--because not one of us has it all together. Not a one. And the only way to get real with others is to start with getting real with ourselves. Let me be painfully honest:
- I get overwhelmed by my schedule and I take it out on my girls. And I hate myself later.
- I struggle going to work and leaving my baby every single day.
- I am quick to jump to negative conclusions.
- I feel like a failure when I step on the scales and see an increase.
- I can't keep my house straight enough no matter how hard I try.
- I let money (or lack thereof) affect my mood all too often.
- I beat myself up over past mistakes and sins--sometimes on a daily basis.
Because if we're going to be good friends, you need to know that I'm a real person, too. And you need to know that I expect you to be a wonderfully real person as well--with all of your perfections and flaws.
So what about you? Are you willing to be brave and admit to the world (and to yourself) that you don't have it all together? Are you willing to tell us what your struggle is right this minute? Are you willing to be human like the rest of us?
I certainly hope so.
Love and smooches,