Mama A Says
Hey Everyone, Mama A here.
Ready to expel unsolicited love and dating and life advice for all of my near and dear college pals.
We know that I'm surrounded by them.
Most days I love it, occasionally I just like it.
It's a good gig for a girl like me.
However, there are some things I'd like to address, but I just can't come out and SAY this stuff as we share a table and try to shovel down red chicken or frito pizza. Especially when you're too busy snoodling with the love of your life (or just the flavor of the month/week/moment). How on earth can I tell you these things without being the awkward Old Lady at the table?
So, allow me to give you the warning. Next time I must just unleash my powers and opinions right there at the table in front of all of your pals.
That Romeo or Juliet in your life is not the end all, be all stud/studette on campus. There are many acceptable choices. In fact, there are many wonderful people who even exist OFF the campus.
Shocking. I know.
Anyhoo, I hate seeing you wither away and die if said person is not within your 5 walking paces radius. What is even more pitiful is how you are up their tail like some lost puppy. And, heaven FORBID if the relationship comes to an end.
Because you, snookums, have completely isolated yourself from the friends and loved ones. Therefore, they have moved to a new regular spot and you will find yourself with no room at theinn circular table.
It's the saddest thing I've ever seen. And it's a malady that tends to repeat itself in all colleges and in all places.
I even admit to being one of those people in my Pirate Princess days. Sad but true. Learn from Mama A's mistakes.
Don't be that girl.
Don't be that boy.
So, that being said, remember your roots. Your pals. Your wide circle of friends that love you like woah. Remember how much fun it is to have many exciting people in your life rather than one person who may or may not be all that cool. And then you start acting like that person, resulting in the loss of your coolness and individuality as well. And then you become weirdo awkward couple with strange inside jokes and you make up your own language.
Wait, did I say that out loud? All of my students are cool.
And, as of the moment, I'm not aware of any new languages between students. If there are, I really don't want to know. Please, please, please do not tell me. I like living in my ignorance of such matters.
So, take this little test to see if you need to evaluate your current situation. If you answer "yes" to any of the questions, you may want to take a deep breath and run screaming to McKinney for an appointment.
1. Do you find that you suddenly love a new style of music, television show, or sport because the love of your life loves it, too (how ironic is that? You love the same stuff???)
2. Can you remember a time this past week a friend dropped by your room just to hang out? (Well, just on Open Dorms--no opposite genders in the rooms, right?)
3. Do you wait for your love to enter the cafeteria so that you won't be alone to eat?
4. Do you think you're big and bad? (You know that, 'I've got a man/woman and I'm awesome' feeling.)
Finally, have you seeked Mama A's Seal of Approval? We know that I like that little role in your lives. And, let's admit, it's a nice moment when I tell you that I approve and even like your relationship choice. Because, I know you need my approval. Right after Jesus and your parents.
Oh wait, you haven't seen Mama A lately because you've been too busy snoodling with your love?
Ahem.
Don't be that girl. Don't be that boy.
For real.
Love and smooches,
Mama A.
Ready to expel unsolicited love and dating and life advice for all of my near and dear college pals.
We know that I'm surrounded by them.
Most days I love it, occasionally I just like it.
It's a good gig for a girl like me.
However, there are some things I'd like to address, but I just can't come out and SAY this stuff as we share a table and try to shovel down red chicken or frito pizza. Especially when you're too busy snoodling with the love of your life (or just the flavor of the month/week/moment). How on earth can I tell you these things without being the awkward Old Lady at the table?
So, allow me to give you the warning. Next time I must just unleash my powers and opinions right there at the table in front of all of your pals.
DON'T PUT ALL OF YOUR EGGS INTO ONE BASKET.
That Romeo or Juliet in your life is not the end all, be all stud/studette on campus. There are many acceptable choices. In fact, there are many wonderful people who even exist OFF the campus.
Shocking. I know.
Take a moment to recover if need be.
Anyhoo, I hate seeing you wither away and die if said person is not within your 5 walking paces radius. What is even more pitiful is how you are up their tail like some lost puppy. And, heaven FORBID if the relationship comes to an end.
Because, horror of all horrors, you won't know who to sit with at lunch or dinner.
Or chapel.
Because you, snookums, have completely isolated yourself from the friends and loved ones. Therefore, they have moved to a new regular spot and you will find yourself with no room at the
It's the saddest thing I've ever seen. And it's a malady that tends to repeat itself in all colleges and in all places.
I even admit to being one of those people in my Pirate Princess days. Sad but true. Learn from Mama A's mistakes.
Don't be that girl.
Don't be that boy.
So, that being said, remember your roots. Your pals. Your wide circle of friends that love you like woah. Remember how much fun it is to have many exciting people in your life rather than one person who may or may not be all that cool. And then you start acting like that person, resulting in the loss of your coolness and individuality as well. And then you become weirdo awkward couple with strange inside jokes and you make up your own language.
Wait, did I say that out loud? All of my students are cool.
And, as of the moment, I'm not aware of any new languages between students. If there are, I really don't want to know. Please, please, please do not tell me. I like living in my ignorance of such matters.
So, take this little test to see if you need to evaluate your current situation. If you answer "yes" to any of the questions, you may want to take a deep breath and run screaming to McKinney for an appointment.
1. Do you find that you suddenly love a new style of music, television show, or sport because the love of your life loves it, too (how ironic is that? You love the same stuff???)
2. Can you remember a time this past week a friend dropped by your room just to hang out? (Well, just on Open Dorms--no opposite genders in the rooms, right?)
3. Do you wait for your love to enter the cafeteria so that you won't be alone to eat?
4. Do you think you're big and bad? (You know that, 'I've got a man/woman and I'm awesome' feeling.)
Finally, have you seeked Mama A's Seal of Approval? We know that I like that little role in your lives. And, let's admit, it's a nice moment when I tell you that I approve and even like your relationship choice. Because, I know you need my approval. Right after Jesus and your parents.
Oh wait, you haven't seen Mama A lately because you've been too busy snoodling with your love?
Ahem.
Don't be that girl. Don't be that boy.
For real.
Love and smooches,
Mama A.
I am starting to think this blog needs to be retitled, relating to the thoughts and opinions of Mama A, and all posts should be written in this style. Because, that. was. awesome. :) And, sadly, something I needed to hear (and really wish I'd heard) in high school.
ReplyDeleteok. loved it. buuuut the best part? the word "snoodling" at the end. genius.
ReplyDeleteYes, I agree with Caroline.
ReplyDeleteAnd I want you to know I just (literally) applauded "Mama A" in my kitchen as I sat reading this over my scrambled eggs :)
and this is why i love you....haha
ReplyDeleteBEAUTY....
Well I guess I will have to come to your office if I ever find someone so you can approve after Jesus and my own Mama. :) Buuuut you won't have to worry about approving anyone for, well, at least a long time.
ReplyDelete