Thursday, May 6, 2010

Smiles and Frowns

Last night some students and I watched "Mr. Holland's Opus."  Such a great movie for any musician.  Good times.  Good laughs.  Good stories that will not be shared with the public but giggled about later.  Sorry to be such a tease, but everyone likes a good inside joke.   Mike and Landon--I love you both in a professional way.

Today I am running around like a mad woman trying to get things straight before the weekend.  Commencement is this weekend at MACU and I'll be gone Friday and Saturday morning.  The girls are going to my mom's for the weekend which is great.  They are very excited and won't even notice that I'm not home on Friday night.

Following commencement, Chris and I will be going to Jill's daughter's art show at ECU.  I feel very honored to have been invited.  We received the invitation about a week ago and it featured the piece that she wrote about here.  When I took it out of the mailbox it immediately caught my eye.  At first I thought it was junk email from Belk's--maybe a leather event.  And then I realized what it was and I felt like all the wind had been sucked from my body.  I just broke down in an ugly cry right there at the mailbox.  I couldn't breathe and my soul just ached at the magnitude of the piece.

I love art.  All mediums.  I love it.  It speaks to me in a way second only to music.  I love it.  In fact, my beloved, Christacular, planned a trip to the art museum in Raleigh on the day he proposed to me on our way back from CCYC because he knew my all time favorite, Toulouse-Lautrec, was on exhibit that month.

Stud.

I digress.

Anyhow.  I'm looking forward to the show in a tortured soul sort of way.  I'm looking forward to the cathartic release.  I'm looking forward to seeing my emotions embodied and being able to see the rawness that I feel on a physical thing.

So, yeah, I'm looking forward to agony and tears.  That's what we artsy people do, ok?

Then, afterwards we may be able to meet up with my oldest friend, Brandon, and his family for dinner.  Brandon and I have been friends since baby shots--seriously.  I miss him so much--and sometimes I wish I still lived in Jacksonville so we could spend more time together.  And with my family.   And the Copelands.

It's going to be a nice weekend.

I'm still waiting on final grades from ECU.  I think I did well, but I hate waiting for the professors to post their grades.  I have learned a lot this year about how to be a better professor from my experiences at ECU.  What to do.  What NOT to do.

I have to give an exam tomorrow at 8am.  Ugh.  Which means I have to leave my house at 5:45am to get there in time to potty before the exam.  I have been fortunate to not have to do this everyday AND Ms. Joan was nice enough to not schedule me on a Tuesday or Thursday, so I'm not going to complain.

I can't ever complain about my job--MACU has been way too kind to me and my family this year.

The end of the academic year is such a strange feeling.  In some ways you are so glad to be getting done with the wear and tear of school, grades, and routine.  It will be nice to operate at my own schedule for a few weeks, spend time with my kids, enjoy summer, and take the time to recover from the year.  I have always wanted to be able to be at home--and this job allows me to sort of live the dream.  I can be home, but I can retreat to work when I feel the need for grownup conversation and exercise my degree (almost a plural statement!)

However, I also tend to get sad at the end of every year.  Most of the time you have to say goodbye to some students and a faculty member or two and that always stinks.  Most of the time you know you won't see them again--even if they promise to come back and see you.

They don't--none of us do.

We all have intentions of visiting and maintaining our friendships, but most of the time life hits us square in the eyes and we do our best to keep up with the chaos of life.  It's not intentional, but it makes me sad when I look around at some of my favorite faces and know that I may or may not see them again until Jesus returns.

So, sweet folks headed to far off places--I'll miss you, dearly.  Behave yourselves and try not to be a stranger.  At least Facebook a sista once in a while!

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