Friday, April 23, 2010

At the end of the day. . .

I will choose Christ.

I will choose my family (those related by blood and choice). 

I will choose my sanity. 

The other things will fall into place in various orders.  

But I can only do one thing well at a time.

It sucks that I'm not as superwoman as I would like to believe.

I feel like a lot of things are left undone these days.

I don't know what else to do--other than just survive until graduation.

I feel like a bad mommy.

I feel like a bad wife.

I feel like a bad friend.

It's nothing personal.

I just don't have time to breathe--let alone call, think of the right thing to do, ask you about your day, make sure I'm involved in your world.

I'm being selfish, and I'm aware of this.

But, in being selfish I'm trying to protect my head.

And my panic level.

No one needs Amanda in the crazy house.

That would just further complicate matters.

I'm feeling the burn.

I feel like I'm going to crack.

I'm doing the best I can, but sometimes it's not good enough.

I'm sorry. 

Please try to understand.  

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