This is Day 28 of the 31 Days of Small series.
They were mean.
Mean enough to make her talk about it.
My biggest girl usually lets the words and moments roll off her back. Or, she'll be the first to laugh at her own mistakes. Perhaps it's her way of self-defense. Maybe if she laughs first, no one else will laugh quiet as loudly.
But sometimes what someone says isn't so funny.
It's just mean.
Everyone remembers how it feels when someone is just out and out mean to them. Everyone knows those days, and everyone has felt the daggers. I remember my own middle school years and I remember being on the receiving end of some mean girls' words. And, to be fair, I remember moments when I wasn't very nice, either.
We didn't call it bullying when I was a kid--bullying was when someone punched you and maybe tried to stuff you in a locker. Sometimes I feel like "bullying" has become too broad a term, but I almost wish some of those girls had just punched me in the face instead of having their words burned into my soul. I carry some of those words to this day and they sometimes affect me--as much as I'd like to try to forget what a stupid 12 year old girl said about me in 7th grade.
And nothing prepares your heart for when someone is mean to your children.
We say that hurting people hurt people. And there is truth to that. This is the kind of small that is not healthy, and not the kind of small I want in my life, nor my children's lives. People will use their words to hurt, and there are people who will do their best to knock you down.
I want to raise the kind of girls who will get back up.
And I want to raise the kind of girls who will hold out their hands to pull other kids up as well.